A love story - After the fight - Part I
>> Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Aryan was trying hard to keep that fake smile pasted for his daughter et al. He didn't realize until these last few days how much he had fallen for Soumya. How deep his attachment was. He cannot imagine how he will go back and live like nothing happened. But leave he did.
Its been a month since he left Mumbai. Her thoughts , her face kept haunting him. He couldn't stay awake and he couldn't sleep. His dream was all about her.. kissing her.. just being with her.
Where ever he went, whatever he did reminded him of her. He had never realized how much entrenched she was in his life... he used to wake up to her voice and sleep to that too and in between too he would get her sms, offliners etc etc.. She knew more about him then anyone else.. she was there when he needed someone and he had hurt her..
He couldn't take it anymore. He had stopped going online and like when Prachi left, he started drinking hard again. It was tough when Prachi left.. but this was tougher. Somehow he had some inkling of the fact that she may leave. And this was unexpected. He wanted so much for this to work..
Days passed by and it was Diwali again. Time for Akshay to come. 6 months since they parted. And Aryan was still the same.. if anything it was worser than before.. sunken eyes and sad face. Akshay was shocked!
"I know its none of my business but you got to talk to me! This wont work! Look at you! and look at pinky! See how sad she looks"
"I can't stay alone anymore Akshay. I have tried and I failed! I thought I loved Prachi and yet the depth of feeling I have for her is not same as I had for Soumya!" he broke down and started crying.
Akshay kept quiet until he cried and the asked." Tell me about her! Why are you guys not together? Everything was fine that day when you guys went to Esselworld!"
"I don't know what went wrong! Everything did! She is so beautiful so successful! Why would she want to be with someone who has a kid from earlier marriage?"
"Did she say that ?" Akshay asked incredulously.
"How can she ? she is too sensitive for that! She can only be friends with me and I want more! I hurt her! How I wish I hadn't kissed her!"
"Tell me what happened not what you think!"
"Okay. We had amazing time! Joking and all.. then we went to her flat. Pinky already slept. We shared a coffee and then we kissed. I was good while it lasted and then she froze. I dunno why!"
"Was she enjoying it?"
"Most definitely"
"Why didn't you ask what went wrong then?"
"What's there to ask? She was too sophisticated for me! Thats just about it. I apologized for it"
"You did?"
"Yeah! and she.. "
"Yes what did she say ?"
"That we are consenting adults exploring possibilities and that It didn't work out!"
"Isnt it possible that she was scared of the emotions you invoke in her and then well she might want some time and not the total break up and your apologizing hurt her?"
"I dont know!"
"Did she try to contact you ?"
"No"
"Did you?"
"How can I?"
"I think you should. Clear it off! If nothing, you can still be friends"
"I don't wanna be friends and see her go with someone else!"
"I still think you should call and talk to her. I feel its your insecurity in regards to her that is hindering your relationship"
"Thanks! That feels just great!"
Akshay keeps quiet after that. They start talking about other stuff. General things his life, office etc etc etc.
In the night, they hear Pinky murmuring in her sleep.
"I don't wanna live. I made my daddy cry. Aunty would be still with dad if I wasn't there. god take me away. Why Aunty hates me? And mom too? God! I don't want dad to hate me too. I want to die"
Aryan couldn't take it. He held his kid and cried. Akshay took him out of the room and put him to sleep.
In the morning, it was time for Akshay to leave. Before leaving he said, " Don't live in regret later on. If your love is strong get answers! She loved you in college you know that! Why can't she love you now? If you can so can she. The fact that she was with you all these days proves that! Go get her! If not for you then for Pinky"
That was a mean thing to say. Akshay knew that but he just had to. When he saw Aryan's pained eyes, he wished he didnt..
Few days later Aryan called.
"I am coming to Mumbai " he said.
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