Deception

Prologue

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I am 60 today. Not that it should matter in any way to the story... but well I am getting awarded achievement award from the President of India. I should be glad. I am not. I am psychologist. Par excellent in everyone's opinion but me. Like every successful psychologist, I have a string of books in my name. I have done my duty by the society by helping police in many ways. I freelance for some NGO and counsel the abused kids and women. I should be happy. I am not. I feel incomplete. Thats why this story.

I wouldn't have written this story, if it wasn't for Myra. Myra my daughter... The one i love the most. The one i have done injustice to. That's the reason,I am gonna put all the truth here. I hope she finds strength to forgive me. I did the best I could.

For the first time in my life.... the only time . I lost my objectivity. I got involved with the subject. She was Myra's mother. Yes Myra is adopted.

I was soo happy back then. Had received my first award. Doing the work I loved and doing well. I know there is nothing much I could have done. The psychologist in me advices me to let go.. The woman in me can't...

I have to do this.. before I receive my award I have to do this!

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Deception- Chapter 1

It was one of the most dismal morning! Like Bangalore is known for .. we had unexpected rains. The traffic jam that ensued had made me upset. I wanted to be home. No I wanted to be with Shlok. My love. and now my husband.

Finally 3 hours late, I reached Kanakpura road where she lived.

Akruti... The victim or the villain? In her case everything is so muddled. You cant help but love her charm..her humor.. her concern.. Such a warm host she was... Even while sporting a huge patch on her eye. she has this huge grin plastered on her face.

" Ah you are completely wet and late", She said tongue in cheek.

" The traffic uff! I am sick of it!" , I replied rolling my eyes.

" Why don't we sit in the kitchen? It is warm and I can make something for you. You must be hungry"

" Oh starving! "

I sat on the dining table as she made coffee. Over coffee and yummy home made bhajiyas we started talking.

" Akruti. You know why I have come here don't you?"

"Yes Dr Rao I know. You guys dont trust my words"

" You have an history with us and not all very good . This time it wont be easy. It will take hard evidence for you to convince me. This is the last time you know"

"Believe me I know. I have lived in the system all my life!"

" Mr Ranganathan is a very respected man. He is my counterpart you know. " , He is a psychologist.

" As if I would forget that! Thats how we met you know. "

The equanimity with which she took my words kind of surprised me. I put it to the fact that she wants to impress me. I decided to play along and said, “ Tell me about it”

“ He was such an handsome man. He still is”, she smiled.

I didn't turn the recorder on. I wanted her to trust me first. We were quiet for some time.. it was as if she was dreaming.. remembering the past. I took the time to observe her properly.
It is very hard to tell much about her features as her eyes was swollen with a black eye, but her mouth was sensitive and with a pout that many would sell their soul to have. Slim and lithe she was still very beautiful. Long eyelashes and intelligent face that was live with good humor and fun.

She was wearing a very pleasing floral saree. And an apron tied to her waist. She looked like any other housewife happy in her life save her face.

“ So serious and so helpful”, she continued.

“ The first time I saw him I fell in love. He didnt want to love me.. but he couldnt resist me”, Still dreaming she started giggling.
“ I seduced him you know. And he drooled like a dog seeing a piece of juicy bone”, she guffawed.

I already started liking her. It became more like talking to a friend.. somewhere down the line we both forgot for what I have come until.....

“ You know he didnt want to marry me. He said I am not his type. He liked his ladies a bit servile and a lot dependant on him. That I am just too independent....” , she said

“ Bull!”, I was indignant! “ Why did you marry him? And how did it happen? “

“ I loved him. Even after all I have faced I still love him. We got married because he loves me. I told you.. I seduced him” she replied.

“ So how many kids do you have? “

Without knowing the bond that we had broke. And this always would be the tone of interview. Somehow we were back to the actual relationship.

“ Don't you have it on file? “, she asked shortly.

“ Yes, I do. I want you to tell me though.”

“ 2. My boy is in 4th std and one girl. She is 7 years old.”

“ Where are they? “

“Both are in boarding school. We didnt want them to be affected by the issues we are facing.”

“ Whose decision was it?”

“ Ours. We decided it unanimously.”

“ Do children like it?”

“ They cannot decide what they want.”

I had antagonized her. I wanted to make amends but her husband came home. I was waiting for her to explain me off as her friend. I wanted to see fear, guilt and servitude that is common in most abused women.

I saw none of those. What I saw was a romantic union of two people so amazingly intune with each other.

They hugged smilingly thats when he noticed me. I saw a change in emotion here. I could see the man visibly closing up. He came to me formally with no smile and yet seemed warm.

“ Ah Dr Rao, pleased to meet you. Congratulations for your award”, he said as we shook hands. He had a firm grip.

“ Thank you. Didnt expect you to recognize me Dr Ranganathan.”

“ Call me Ananth. We all need to keep tabs about the competition don't we?” He laughed.
“ Quite true”, I replied laughingly.

“ I hope you would stay for dinner”

“ Oh no. I have already taken too much of Akru's time. I got to go.”

“ Please stay. It was fun”, Akriti said without any enthusiasm.

“ I insist. Lets have dinner in some restaurant. We have one nearby. The food is awesome you got to taste it”, he said.

Somehow I suddenly wanted to leave. I couldn't possibly like both of them. They were a very likable and warm couple. I wondered what evilness lurked behind the man to hurt the wife he loves so much. Thats what interests me in my field. The complexity of human mind.

“ No some other time.” I replied. “ We will keep meeting for next few weeks. Why don't we meet for lunch. I would like to ask you few questions” I was all business.

“ Sure. Anytime you would like.” he complied.

Soon I left their house with a very warm send off. Akriti even gifted me a casket of wine. I hadnt had fun for a long time. I even shared my life with her. She was so easy to talk to. I missed my girlfriends who had become busy with life kids n family.

Dr Ranganathan seemed to know what I was there but he didnt seem angry at all. Akriti was very friendly initially, but asking her more than what she wanted to say made her angry. I couldn't peg both of them. I should be able to. I am a psychologist!

Soon I received Shlok's call and I forgot all about them....

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Beauty in the eyes of beholder

Prologue

You have always been with beautiful girls all your life. You never had to run behind them. But you belong to me, such is your fate. You belong to me... this plain looking not charming at all girl, She said.

"Oh my charming bride, this is what I was looking for, this is what I chose. I wouldn't want it in any other way", I replied.

"My love, Embrace me"

" Gladly my dear"

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A bet - The last laugh!

P.S: I haven't written a story for long.. how ever my darling friend Neeraja told me one of her funniest incident on which this story is developed upon.. For this I dedicate my story to my darling sweetheart!

It is a beautiful wintery morning. Birds chirping, flying over the rosy hued sky with golden sun yawning lustily and peeping .. taking its own time rising. A wonderful day for morning walk. Not chilly enough to make you want to curl inside your blanket and not hot enough to sweat.

Standing in the line since pre dawn, the last thing Radha noticed is the weather. She was here in Tirupathi to visit the Lord Balaji. Not that she is very religious. It would be hard to believe that this girl praying fervently right now had once declared emphatically that if god exists he is an asshole. Incidentally, this irony was lost on her.

Tall with shoulder length dark thick silky hair, she should turn many a shoulders. But awkward grace and innate shyness made her pile up the hair under a cap which she refuses to take out even in the heat being cooped up in an narrow corridor; made her inconspicuous. A lil on the plump side she fights a daily losing battle with weight gain. Nondescript but regular features which on first look looks plain however gives a certain impish beauty to her face. We can say her beauty grows on you. Wearing a very unconventional attire for the temple visit- jeans and tee shirt thats 2 size too big for her , we could say that no one would bother to give her a second glance.


" Please god let him love me. I may not get such a tall man in my life again. He even has mustache! My dream man! I know I have been very disrespectful of you but I will make it up by intense religiousness all my life. Will do a big aarti for you. They say repentance is always accepted. Kindly accept mine."

Radha was busy praying since she started to stand in the queue. Queue that seemed endless and yet she wouldn't stop praying.

As the time passed most people lost their devoutness and started cracking jokes and chat with each other to pass time but not Radha. She was on a mission. Like everything else that she did in her life, Radha prayed with a doggedness that would have defeated most.

After 3 hours in the queue she finally reached near the inner sanctum of lord Balaji. She prayed,

" Please god give me some signal that you hear me! make something fall! Make Ronit love me. I know he is debonair.. he is handsome he is sexy.. please god.. I love him a lot. If you feel he can love me.. show me an indication.. make something fall! Please god. I wouldnot ask anything from you ever again! please!"


After offering her fleeting prayer she stared at god beseechingly.. willing for some flower to fall. Thats when there was a huge commotion in the back.

Apparently, someone had fallen down. And even in god's own home ppl cannot let go their ego.. or their anger and end up fighting with each other loudly. Radha's mouth curled into a smile on its own. She couldn't help but laugh at god's wry humor :)

It took all of her presence of mind and stamina for Radha to reach out of the temple avoiding the pushing angry and unruly devotees. *smirks*

" Can't you have a better meeting place? " Radha quipped as she looked up towards the open sky.

She was again at odds with God. He had given her a signal alright. As they say, better know what you are asking. The signal was as vague as confusing as it can get. Radha was yet clueless if god gave a positive or negative signal.

As she stood in the hot sun in the mid morning, all Radha could think was the bus.. and her home and AC. Two hours hence, the bus was no where in sight. Radha worked in an call center and had her shift by 5:30 in the evening and it was 12:00 pm. It was 5 hours of travel. Radha sighed. She will be late again. And all the effort she took was futile!

Ronit would still go to the party with Smruti the sexy sophisticated beautiful bitch!! Things couldn't have been worser. Radha's boss hated her for being the only girl in the team and a plain looking woman. Not only that, She was more competent with all the team put together. He is bound to use this chance to its fullest to be rude to her. As usual no one will interfere not even she herself. She has long given up the idea of fighting for injustice, she knows it doesnt help at all and it spoils the future. Its better to listen and forget.....

"Please god! I know you have a very nasty sense of humor. But i need to reach office on time! Lets have a bet. I am challenging you to make me reach office on time. I say its nearly impossible! If I reach office on time.. I accept for ever that you exist and that Ronit is mine.. or else I forever renounce you. So you better show some of your power and make me reach office on time."

Predictably, the bus arrives. And its surprisingly fast and com[letely empty. Radha sends an thank you message to god and keeps her fingers crossed. They reached the city in record time! It was just shy of 5:10 pm when the bus reached the bus stand.

And one more miracle, Radha got a cab to her office as soon as she got down.

"Thank you lord. Thanks for being there for me. I know i never accepted that you existed. But now I am a convert. Thank you."

Radha believed that today stars would change and Ronit will notice her. She starts sprucing herself in the cab itself. Suddenly the cab stops. The wristwatch shows that its 5:20 pm. She is not concerned. They are near her office.

She asks the driver, " Bhaiyya kya hua?" * What happened? *

" Malum nahi memsaab. Check karna padega." *donno got to check*

" Der lagega kya." * will it take time? *

"Ab kya batau.. pata nahi. Ek kaam kijiye aap dusra cab le lijiye"
* What can i say? I donno. Please take a different cab.*

" Ab office door nahi hai.. Agar der nahi hoga toh mein rukh sakti hoon"
* My office is not far. I can wait if it wont take time*

" Jaisi aapki marzi memsaab. 10-15 min lagenge atleast"
*As you wish maam. Wil take 10- 15 min atleast*

"Fir mein chalti hun. Kitna hua?" * Then I will leave. Whats the fare? *

"Aap rehne dijiye" *Let it be*

She could not believe her ears. A cab driver refusing fare?? !!! She became sure that miracles do happen and its happening to her!.

She saw that its 5:25 pm already and started to run. She will be sweaty and completely messy. Sleepless night and constant travel will show.. But she didn't care. Things are going to be just fine.

Surprisingly, she reached on time. Got lift on time. Radha quickly thanked god again.
As soon as she reached her bay she saw no one was around. When she asked a guy from opposite bay she realized everyone is congregated in the conference room.

She quickly reached the conference room and opened the door.

"Friends we are here to celebrate engagement of our very own Casanova. Yes ladies, Ronit is no longer free. He is engaged to none other than Smruti!!"

" Lets have a toast to their happy life together"

To avoid the roaring congratulations and excited back patting, Radha closed the door quietly.

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A love letter

Darling,

Would u understand it?? how can you? I myself am not understanding it!!

I want more from life.. for long i was thankful for what life gave me and yet wasnt happy.. and today.. yesterday tomorrow everything seems wonderful.. coz i want more.. I want more from myself from life from everyone...

I have never given myself a chance to expect and yet i wasnt satisfied.. Today I expect a lot and yet i am happy :)

I have become a bit needy a bit desperate.. but i am still happy .. I want more...


Do you undertsand it? Would you give more?

Coz i want more.. I wanna give more take more :)

Here i sit with this beautiful song singing in the back ground... fresh air which still has scents of yesterdays rain... its cold... very cold.. and yet I think of you... Do u understand y i do it?

I sometimes feel i am being stupid.. but the same recklessness is here.. to overtake... to take control... but is it taking control or am i losing it?

Do you know? Coz I dont..

I check the email 10 times a day... and still wait for it.. do u know for what?? and then.. when i think it wont b there.. there it is.. delighting me.. i wonder y i am not angry for the delay.. why i am just happy.. it refuses to reply...

My inner voice says... listen to the silence.. what does it say? I donnot know.. All I know it things r just the same and yet its new...

Or may b what changed in my perspective.. but do u know? can u feel it too?

With loads of love,

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Last excerpts of a dairy of lady out of love....

Its over! everythings over! That cad! I will never see his face again. He broke my heart.. and my pride. How much I trusted him.. and now ..

I opened my heart my soul and now i have nothing to hold on to..

My dreams my pride my confidence.. MY LIFE... everything is in shambles. How could I have been so blind? how can I trust so much?

Oh how will i handle this pain.. this pain that blinds my eyes deafens my ears and yet an yet my heart screams.. screams in the emptiness.. emptiness that engulfs me.. chaotic and yet silent...

I am just hanging there... On the very edge of sanity and insanity I find myself.. I dunno whether to laugh or to cry...

Never again will i ever trust anyone.. never again.. the guy who made me feel woman again has insulted my womanhood so completely that I myself do not know what I am anymore.. or what he was!

How can a person be in love and so cruel? Many say you were lucky to be saved.. What is saved is just a corpse an incubus... the undead.. wouldnt it be better if i wasnt alive?....

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An exceprt of love

This is an excerpt from a dairy of a lady who newly has found love. She is not sure of him yet or her feelings but the bubble of love is beautiful and enticing... Her feelings.. her thought.. Here it goes...

I wait for his call like some wait for good news, impatient but patient * freaking stupid phrase*. I am not in love yet... but I am attracted. He stimulates my senses in a special way.. in a way no one has ever... He makes me feel like a woman. Ver attractive woman. Not for my looks but for me.. for what I am. I dunno if he feels the same. if this is new for him too. It is for me n I feel special... special in a way I cant imagine. But this is not love yet. It has a potential.. we can fall in love yet if we let it grow.. it can b something very beautiful.. oh what possibilities.. how wonderful and exciting!

We have revealed so much of ourselves. I dunno if we can adjust normally... I cannot.. i guess.. I am afraid to flirt.. I am afraid he will run away.. I am sure he will. At the same time...I am scared to let this opportunity go.. What if he isnt what he seems to be? I dont know him from adams.. what if he is a psycho! Will i feel the same for him even then?

He seems to have suffered a lot in his life.. He has been strong.. what if he is not strong enough? wht if he has reached his limit? Will i b able to stand by him? Am i really sure?
So many questions.. for all I know nothing may ever come through.. So in the meantime I will enjoy the ride.. and yes.. no regrets.. not now not in the future...

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One more love story or????????

P.S : This story is dedicated to one of my sweet lil friend. He has repeatedly urged me to write and hence I have come out of oblivion to oblige him :-) Arty this is for you

" Why don't you come with me? " , Larry asked Jane.
" I am sorry I can't. They need me!" , she replied forlornly.
" What about me Jane? Dont i need you?", He asked frustratedly.

They have exchanged the same words time and again these past 5 days. Jane turned towards the window. Looking at the setting sun, she felt as if its sunset of her life. Tears streamed undetected.

Like always, he was the one to go to her, give her a hug. In her lover's arms, she wept her heart out. Tears started pouring from Larry's eyes too.
" I love you Jane. I cannot live without you"
" They donot need you as I do."

Even in her lover's arm, Jane couldn't forget her family... " They need me more..."
" Dammit! Do you realize ... do you realize they donot give a damn about you?"
" How could you be so blind? tell me! How could you? "
" They are not unkind or hate me.. They are only forgetful! "
"Oh shoot!You do realize right? that if i leave I never come back!!"

Jane starts crying again. She didn't know what to do. They are all she has. And now him. How can she choose?

Larry can see resoluteness in her eyes. He feels she has given up. He feels soo afraid!

" do you think they will miss you if you left? I bet they won't! But I.. I keep count of each second you are away from me.. and yet you want to let me go? "

Jane was shocked.. shocked at Larry's cruel words and hurt too.. And yet she could understand his pain... She went to him and kissed him lightly on his cheek and forehead..

Like always passion was the answer.. the comfort. Larry sometimes didn't undertsand how they could be arguing and yet it took one touch.. one kiss to forget everything but the fact that Jane was in his arms.

But this time he decided, this time they wont part like this. Desperately he controlled his feelings and moved back from her.

Jane didn't understand what went wrong. On moment before they were close and the next.. he left her..

For long both didnt say anything.. The silence was lengthening like the evening shadows..

Larry said, " Jane. I see that we are wasting time here. Time that is left.. time that is precious. I donot want to leave you with only memories of tears of our last few days. I want us to be happy until we can"

" Larry... ", Jane started.

" No.. let me finish." Sotto voice he continued, " As I said, I want us to be happy while we are here. There is nothing new that I said in the past few days.. and nothing new in what you said. You know what I think about your family. And I know that I've hurt you. If I am sorry then its for hurting you.. but i believe what i said is true. I think you will u\s in future. I will still wait.. Such is the fate of lovers.. waiting.. But you know I can't wait for long. So I am here for 5 more days. In this 5 days, if you feel like meeting me I am here. If you change mind I am here.. Rest I leave it to god. "

Jane had no words to say. How can she think of her life without him!

Its her eyes that could speak words her mouth could not. For long she looked at him. It was like she already lost him... His face was unreadable and so was his heart. It was as if he wanted to save his emotions and he had locked his thoughts and his heart.

She couldn't take it anymore and she ran off.

Larry saw her going. He didnt try to stop her. He had lost her. Now all he had was blind hope and bitterness. For long he kept staring in the direction she went as if he could will her to appear. And then as the moon shined up in the sky he cried. He cried for himself for jane and for their fate. Oh how he wished they have never met!

Larry had given up. He cried in front of her. He was angry on her. He reasoned with her. but result was same....

Jane was walking for a long time thinking.. if that could be called thinking.. Larry's words were still echoing in her ears. Without her knowledge her legs took her to her home. She didnt realize she was standing in front of the main door staring evidently for a longtime.

Her mom came down and opened the door and shook her.

" Whats the matter hon? ", asked mom.

She hugged her mom and said, " Mom! I am in love"

" Thats wonderful darling. Why don't you go up and change? Your dad doesn't like you to be late"

" Mom I said I am in love." Jane wailed.

" I heard you sweetheart. Now run and get changed like a good girl you are."

" Yes mommy."

Jane was hurt by her mother's insensitivity. She knew that her mom loved her only was a lil insensitive. She excused her mom.

" I am in love", Jane said. Facing her 2 brothers sister and parents she tried once again.

No one said anything. They listened to her and moved on to other topics like she has said something inconsequential. Suddenly she was angry! How can they all be so? Larry's words echoed in her mind. She got up from dinner table. excused herself and ran to her room.

Now every one was concerned. They looked at each other finally went to her room to talk to her.

Dad said, " I am sorry sweetheart to have hurt you. Can you forgive me please? I will buy you your favorite chocalate. Isabel, Make her favorite dishes tomorrow all day"

Jane hardly ever got angry and when she did, her family made it a point to pamper her. But this time jane wasn't mollified. They could feel that but didn't know what to do.

Jane acted as if she was fine. She realized, although they pampered her.. no one really thought about her or why she was angry.. Her family failed her in one night.. She decided to take a test. She wanted to know if she was really blind... if what larry said was true...

The next day she called her friend Rita for help. Rita and Jane were inseperable always. Larry had promised her that she can keep contact wid rita always. He will make sure of that. :-)

Rita loved Larry as much as he loved her. Rita was all for her leaving.

" I know its hard for you to leave. But you deserve happiness and love. All your life you did everything for them and they don't even notice. Let alone appreciate", rita said. She thinks Jane is stupid to let go of only person who loves her.

Like with Larry, Jane has had many discussions with Rita. But today Jane was not in mood to discuss.

" Rita I need your help. I want to know if Larry is right! I am going to disappear. I want to see how soon they come to know. Okay? "

" Are you sure dear?"

" Yes very. I cant go on like this."
" Oh honey!" Saying this Rita hugs her. Like always she finds kindness and comfort in her friends hug.

So finally they decide to execute the plan. She leaves with her friend with pretty much nothing. Jane was sure ppl would miss her soon. 3 days pass by.. no one even notice that she is lost :

* i know seems too careless. Its just that they assume she is in her room or wid her friend etc etc.. no one notices.. not coz they don't care.. just that they r indifferent....*

On the fourth day, Jane writes a letter to her parents and leaves to meet Larry.

That would be the last time anyone saw Jane. You see Larry was a ghost.. or rather like most say.. he was figment of her imagination.. Surprisingly her family got her letter though.....

And Rita? She was an illusion too. Jane was schizophrenic....


I changed the story in between. This is not what i felt like writing... But somehow this came with the flow.. I may even write the earlier ending... do tell me if u wanna know wht the letter held.. or if u wud like the other ending!

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Ice Princess

She was the ice princess.. ruling her plush frozen world. She lyked it that way.. everything frozen .. ppl too.. kept peace.. she liked to roam abt in her own castle.. then on day something unimaginable happened... she fell in love with a reflection : a reflection of prince.. prince in shining armour.... she fell so much in love that she forgot.. or rather didnt care enough to preserve the ice.... she wanted to let him in.. into her frozen fortress... she opened all the doors... put the red carpet in his welcome.. he was charmed by this reception.. n ice princess's beauty didnt hurt his eyes too... Like most guests.. he was deluded into thinking he deserved everything.. her heart ... her identity.. he started misusing it... but he forgot.. he was here juss as a welcome guest.. for all her love ice princess was juss that.. princess of her world the ruler.. and no one can take that from her even if she offered... after all it was "her" world!

Princess realized her world and herself were being trampled all over.. she tried to ignore it but cudnt for long and finally chucked him off and closed the door... but she realized late that by letting him in.. she let heat in and... everything thawed n was in molten state.. even the walls.. ice walls were molten now she had no security everything had crashed .. alll that was left was chaos... tumultuous life breathed .. peace was shattered.. if u can call what was as peace! And seeing open place many came in... Princess didnt want them to come.. it washer world and these uninvited guests were not important enough to share her world..

It took all her energy to rebuild the walls... but she had lost ground and her foundations r shaky and hence she needs to guard the walls and yeah.. the chaos were.... are still rampant

*dun try to make sense of this*

* or rather try it :P *

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Language of Love

This story is dedicated to only guy i know who is ready to accept the fact that he likes romantic stories. The beauty of this acceptance was his reason. It was for the same reason that I love romantic stories! Coz they don't happen in real life. I always believed this. I know this is too long. Please bear with me. The old woman in me doesn't want to stop


He was a spoilt brat. Elder son of a very wealthy father who never had time for him. And he had no time for his father anyways. He was smart and funny. His friends loved him . Though more often than not he wondered if they like his wealth more or him! But the exhuberence of youth never lets him to think. Afterall he has all his life to think about it.

She was sweet and charming girl. Every one loved her. Apple of mothers eye and pride of her dad. She was obedient all in all a model daughter. In real life they would have never met. They move in different circles. He likes and values sophistication and she is all innocence! But when cupid strikes, there is nothing any one can do but wait and watch.


Cupid did hit these two people. It wasn't any special day nothing magical. Just another Monday. She woke up early to water the plants and then sit to study. She believed in early to rise early to bed maxim. His day had just ended! After a weekend of sinful pleasure he was back pleasantly drunk!


Usually he would directly go to bed. For some reason he came to stand by the balcony. (Cupid at work no doubt). He was standing there with no particular thought looking around. Her balcony faced his.
The moment he saw her, he was lost. Shall we say it to be pleasant coincidence or love at first sight? Yeah i can see some derisive smirks and thass y this is a story and not reality. So the saga of hidden glances start. The guy makes it a point to be there every morning. So he starts sleeping early. He finds out that she is from nearby college so he starts going to college. Slowly, he starts taking interested in studies. He got something to look forward to. Something other than empty home.


Six months passed. Surprisingly, he never tried to speak to her. Their eyes and smiles said everything that needed to be expressed. They were in love and not a word was spoken. Not a day spent togather. Only their daily ritual of early morning....

She would water plants. He would stand in balcony drinking coffee. She would smile. he wud wave hi and so would she. Then they would stare a little till she becomes shy and breaks contact. He would get desperate for eye contact again. She would shyly look up. he would smile with relief which make her more shy and she would go in. If someday he didnt come, she will be distressed and would stay all day as much as possible by the window until he comes. He had checked that many times and found it endearing.


And so had she. Finally, one fine day, he wrote her a letter. Love letter. A guy who mocked others' romantic overtues was being the biggest romantic fool! Paradoxial isnt it? He waited like an expectant father for a reply. Now my more discerning readers wud ask how did he give it to her? If he did personally, did he talk to her too? My reply is.. thats where younger siblings come in picture. His brother acted messenger for him.


She was clueless what to do. She wanted to reply. She liked him a lot possibly loved him. However, she wasnt sure if he is the guy for her. He was handsome n used to so many sophisticated gals. How is he gonna want a homely gal wid middle class back ground? Well she dint know like us that Cupid was the culprit! so she stewed n worried for 10 days. Heart won over the head. She replied back to him.

Its been 10 days.. she never showed up by the balcony. He was becoming more and more listless. She hadn't turned up mornings like they always did. He for the first time in life thought he is gonna lose something. He didnt know how he is going to handle it. After a very long time that night he went out to get drunk and mindless party. He hoped he can forget her. He was trying for the first time in 6 months. Never before. It was too hard.

The next morning she was waiting for him desperately. He didnt come. She was confused. What went wrong?? Did he stopped waiting for her? Did he get a new girl and was bored of her? Mindless possibilities.. but the truth is something else.

He came home late in the afternoon and straight went to sleep. It was late in the evening his brother could give him the letter. Yes, the letter written by her to him.

He was ecstatic. She loves him as much as he does. They are meant to be togather forever. He was esctatic! He dint know how to contain this happiness. He went to balcony and glanced at her balcony. She wasn't there. Obviously! She is in college. He sighed and grinned stupidly! They are meant to be, else how can they both experience such an strong attraction without having a word spoken. If anything that concerned him was her demand that he ask her dad's permission and that she won't be his girl friend. He thought how middle class. But then thats what she was. He jumped in the air. Danced with his mother. Hugged his lil brother. Never was he soo genial. Everyone were happy for him. And yes he told his parents and they readily agreed. After all only his happiness mattered. They were caring parents only very busy.

All night he dreamed. How her voice would be? It would be sweet for sure. Someone so sweet can't have a rough voice. How she will sing for him and he would lie down in her lap.content with the world. How perfectly wonderful. The next da he was eager to see her. He sat in the balcony since 5:00 am. It was 6:00 she came in the morning. She seemed sad but the moment she saw him.. her face lit with joy. It was positively radiating happiness.. bith stared a lot smiled a lot.. had their fill of each others sight... they hadnt met for 12 days now!

That evening, he went to meet her parents. He asked her dad in all humility. Told him everything even that his parents have no issues as long as marriage is after their studies are done. They will meet him over the weekend. Her father listened to everything quietly. And then slowly said no. And said never to come back or try to contact her. He didnt understand why. He kept trying to make her dad change his decision... night and day he tried. Finally after 1 month when he didnt show any signs of letting go.. the father broke down his resolve. He cudnt bear to be rude to a guy who evidently so much in love and he couldnt see the mute misery in his daughters eyes. She didnt express anything but he could see the misery. So.... the father tole him. Told him that she is dumb and deaf. She can't speak anything!

He was shocked. Stunned infact. How can he not know? Why didn't he try to talk to her ever?? He just didnt.. never felt the need. He father asked him if he is willing now? He was too stunned for the words to register and before it did and he could reply her father left. Crying and broken.

That day after he returned home he decided to leave the place. He told no one but his mother and left. And after that day no one ever heard from him.
She stayed behind. Not one day went when she didnt long for him. Her love for him still didnt reduce. She knew he loved her but could accept her as she is. But her love for him wasnt based on words.. it was mute and hence more potent. She knew he will return. She waited for him. Their love was beyond words beyond feelings.. It was the love of the soul. She had sensed the same need in him.. the mute plea of silence. choked up words.

One year passed, he didnt come yet. She started losing hope. Her father had already lost it. He was forcing for her marriage now. He had started seeing new matches for her. Until now nothing ahd worked out. Everyone loved her until they realised she was deaf and dumb and then....

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It was hard to keep the hope alive. But she did! And then one day he returned. Handsomer than before if that is possible and happy. He didnt seemed to have missed her or went through the same kinda hell (If only she knew... ) When she saw him, she knew her wait was useless. She decided to save her dignity. Next time when she was watering plants and he came with the cup of coffee she smiled and moved inside as soon as possible without seeming as running away.

Few days later, he came home... her home. She returned from college to see him there. We wont discuss about how hopeful and happy she felt in an instant. Its enough to know she felt it. She was too shy to look at his face for longer than a moment in front of his and her family. She looked down and thats when she glanced at the bunch of invitations for the marriage in his hands.

She felt the ground move beneath her legs. Shattered would be a understatement. Like a numb statue she went inside. In the cove of hiding. Long after they all left she didnt come out. No one disturbed her. After all they knew she needed time alone. They decided not to go to the wedding. She came out. Teary -eyed and all red. Her father wished that guy never came in his flowers life so angry he was but he never cursed the guy.

The only demand the gal made was that they would go to the wedding. Father was distraught. He denied. But this was the first demand his child made and the first time she was difiant. He had to agree.

Finally the day came. No one was in the mood to go. But for this wonderful sweetheart everyone got ready in their best jewellery (After all they need to maintain the standards they r going to a rich man's wedding) In all the confusion they never bothered to read the invitation. After all they knew the venue. The bungalow next door.

The moment they came, they were given special treatment. They were confused whats going on. They were taken to a wonderful room and then the groom and his family came in to thank them for coming. They were clueless whats going on. Just for conversation sake , mother asked who the bride family are. (the usual thingy moms generally ask ...) Well they didnt or couldnt imagine the next words the groom said. He said it you guys. And then he turned to her and said 'I love you' in the sign language.

He said this is not the only words i know. I learned the language to be able to converse with you. Though for our love words werent essential why for our life together it is necessary I dont know. But now I am equal to you. Will you accept me?. These last words were directed to the father of the gal.

What happened next requires no description. The father over come with tears of joy hugs the groom says, I am the luckiest father around and certainly the happiest. The groom and the bride hugs each other too and then they move on to the waiting wedding pandal


Needless to say, they live happily ever after.

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A Love Story- A night to remember.

Chapter 5

Soumya had left in hurry. Her flat was in a big mess. She tried to do disaster management before Aryan came up. She didnt want him to think that she is sloppy. She cleared the hall of all the mess and was working on the bedroom when Aryan came in.

"Hey, you got a awesome flat"

" You wouldn't say that if you see the bedroom" , Soumya quipped.

Aryan walked to the bedroom and guffawed. " Oh my god, So you are not perfect. I was afraid of it".

" Don't make fun of me" , she replied embarrassed.

" No, I am not. I am relieved. I was afraid to invite you to my place. Now I can" he said.

"Oh well, pinky is stirring lets put her on the bed and then you can help me clear."

" Keep dreaming sweetheart. Me and help? "

" Brute!"

He bowed and she left huffily to clear the bed of all her clothes.

"Put some music na? And yeah make yourself at home in the kitchen and grab anything you like" she said.

Aryan walked over to the CD collection she had. Bryan adams, Creed, Ghazals and songs of Kishore kumaar. He knew their choice were same.. but to see all the songs he wanted in there made him to dream..

Soumya was busy cleaning. She was glad he didnt take her offer. ' Imagine him looking at her undergarments strewn....' She went red with shame. She remembered how many times she changed her clothes. 'Stupid you soumya!'

She realized no music is coming and no noise too. She had cleared the bed and other such assortments. Soumya wasn't sloppy. So more or less her flat was clean. She moved to hall and saw Aryan dreaming. She hoped he was dreaming about her. 'Wishful thinking!' Her very practical brain reminded.

She moved in softly, picked Pinky who was snoring softly and moved her to the bed and changed her clothes to something soft. She had some night clothes for her sister's kid who visited her sometime. Then she moved to kitchen and to make coffee.

All this time Aryan was busy dreaming a perfect night together. He could see how beautiful his future could be .. Together

He was interrupted by a sound. He turned to see Soumya take Pinky into the bedroom. It was such a sweet sight to see. A lady whom he loved was putting the girl he loved to bed. Nothing was as touching as this....

Sighing, Aryan followed Soumya to the kitchen. Now that Pinky is not with them, the tension that was thrumming in the background all through the day surfaced. Both were afraid to talk. Afraid to take the next step. All Soumya wanted was to kiss him.. and she knew it was dangerous. She knew now if she slips, she may never ever recover. And it was dangerous because she didnt want to recover.

The silence extended for long. Soumya acted as if she was very busy making coffee and Aryan as if he is looking around.. The silence was broken by the coffee maker. Soumya poured it in two cups and offered it to Aryan.

Their fingers brushed each other. It was as if electric shock coursed through Soumya's body. That awareness of each and every pore of herself.. the acute pleasure that a casual touch evoked in her was something she had never experienced.

Aryan was never affected by anyone as this delightful creature with moussed hair... obviously pinky was her usual self he grinned. All Aryan wanted was to love her. Tenderly and softly. ?He wanted to show how much he loved her. But he wasnt sure... He cannot destroy this friendship...

Soumya was gorgeous successful and beautiful. He wasnt sure he was the one for her. Aryan cleared his throat and said huskily,

" you remembered . Just as I like. strong hot and a dash of sugar and a dash of milk"

" Didnt need much of a remembering.. thats how I take it!" , she replied..

Their eyes met for the first time in the kitchen. Aryan could see desire in her. But was that love? He was not sophisticated enough to screw and forget....

Soumya knew he wanted him. But the romantic heart wanted to be wooed.. she wanted him to make the first move!

And then she lowered her eyes, took a sip and lowered the cup. The cup fell with a thud as Aryan tried to catch it...At the same time soumya reached for it. Their hands met once again.

Later when she looked back Soumya wasnt sure who started it but they shared a kiss. Lip to lip. There are no words to describe the feelings the pleasure.. It was a kiss of love and that should suffice.

In that brief moment, Aryan went to heaven and came back. It was never like this not even with Prachi in their best of the days.. Surely she loves him??

Soumya resurfaced from the whirlpool of emotions she was drowning into. '

'Omigod!' She thought. 'This is better than what I thought it would be. If it goes any further I will surely drown. I need to resurface. What if he doesnt love me? Can I live without this?'

Suddenly she broke the kiss and said.. " Lets move to the patio. It has wonderful view of the lake. Especially in the moonlight it looks awesome"
Aryan wanted to ask what went wrong. She had enjoyed it needed it as much as he did. Why did she freeze so? He felt like a fool. Ofcourse she didnt like it.. who was he kidding! She is used to better kissers than he ever could be. He followed her in silence.

Once they reached patio she said, " I will bring something to munch and a coffee for myself".

He understood her need to be alone for sometime. He needed to think. control his emotions. He decided to say sorry and that it won't repeat again.

Soumya cleaned the floor and thought about the kiss again. It was wonderful. She decided to let cautions fly in the wind and take from life whatever she can get. After all its better to experience once than not to experience at all. She returned with a smile on her face all ready to let the moonlight do its magic.

She saw him smoking. The moment she returned, he turned. From his face she knew something is wrong. she froze. May be he didnt like it as much as she did. She was afraid and gave a tremulous smile.. This is the first time she felt insecure... first time it meant so much more than just a kiss ..

With no further ado he said, " Soumya, I am sorry. This shouldn't have happened. Forgive me. I shouldnt have kissed you!"

She was taken aback. Only pride was her solace. She replied " And what makes you think that I would have let you kiss if i didnt wish so?" " And you are right this was a mistake and shouldn't be repeated".

Aryan was hurt. He never knew it could hurt like this. Within a few minutes, he has seen heaven and hell both.

"Soumya, please. I didnt want to hurt you... Its just that...." , Aryan said miserably. As he said he knew it was a terrible mistake.

"

Excuse me. I am not hurt. I was disgusted that you can think you can kiss me and then apologize! We are not teenagers! We are consenting adults who decided to explore possibilities. Too bad it didnt work out. Now lets drop this subject", Soumya replied.

She saw him visibly cringe but she couldnt stop herself. She has to survive.

" yes you are right." "Good night soumya. ", Aryan replied dully.

" Please sleep with Pinky. I will sleep in the hall."

" No. No. Please you sleep on the bed. I will sleep on the sofa" He cannot think of sleeping on her bed feeling her smell and living through the night. How will he live through the night!

" ahem. Being chivalrous are we?", Soumya couldnt believe that they are talking about normal stuff.

"Nothing like that Soumya. I cannot bear to sleep in your bed" , He replied.

" But can share my home for the night is it? Oh alrite take the sofa". She misunderstood him completely.

He was furious but he didnt say anything. He knew if he did he wouldnt be in control of himself. He left mutely.

Soumya cried all night. How can her dream come true turn into a night mare? She cried herself to sleep.

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A Love Story-Day out in Essel world.

Chapter 4


Soumya had a bad time sleeping that night. She was too excited. The whole magical evening went through her mind again and again. She remembered the way Aryan looked at her. She had imagined it many times but she didn't even come close enough to the truth.

Her conversation with Sunitha though hurt her but in the hindsight she realised its for the best! If Aryan's best friends are worried means he does care for her! There is hope. It improved her mood a lot the next morning.

After day dreaming most of the night, Soumya woke up late. She was disorganised. She was facing the most difficult task in the world, which I am sure my female readers would symphatize with and male readers would be derisive about! What to wear! Soumya wanted to seem friendly, sexy elegant yet comfortable to roughen it out.

She finally decided to wear a black capris with pink embroidery and a sleeveless pink halter top. She had a chic black purse to go with it and for accessories she chose a teardrop pink earrings and a plain thin golden chain with a pendant of angel. After getting ready hastily she gave a last glance at herself. 'Not bad for a 15 min make up' she thought.

She was late. Pinky had been waiting for 30 min by the window impatient! Sunitha had time and again asked her to have breakfast but Pinky refused. Finally, Aryan had to feed her. In that confusion they missed Soumya's coming!

Soumya reached the flat. She saw the door was open and there was a lot of commotion. Evidently Pinky was being naughty. It warmed her heart. She entered to see Pinky sitting on the window and Aryan feeding her. Something clutched in heart. She knew at that moment she will kill for these two people if needed. She realised she was in love with pinky juss like that.

Finally, Pinky saw her and she ran to her and hugged her tight!

' What aunty you are late!" , pinky complained.
"Thank god that i atleast came", Soumya retorted and kissed pinky. She looked at Aryan, there was a weird exprerssion on aryan's face. She didnt understand it. She looked at him askance. He shook his head indicating nothing. She let it go.

"Finally you are here! Pinky was waiting for you since an hour and making all us frantic too", Sunitha said in mock exasperation.

Every one laughed. Shyly, Pinky tucked behind Soumya and clung to her. It was so beautiful. Its how Aryan had dreamed. He knew now for sure, he has to be with soumya. He wished he had taken time to know her when they were in college.

Finally they sat in the car and started towards Gorai. All through the way they kept blasting music and singing along. It was a fun ride for all of them.

They reached Essel world and the mayhem began! Any one with a small kid knows how exhuberent they are and how difficult it is to control them. It was complete chaos! And Aryan had his hand full coz he dint have one but two kiddoes on his hand!
Soumya and Pinky tried every ride! From artic circle to Zipper dipper. for bump them car to thunder

They had countless ice creams. And god knows what. And there were many special moments when their eyes met. That special secret smiles and glances.


Especially during the aqua dive! They screamed and in the fall from the height , Soumya held his hand instinctively. Aryan held on even when she tugged it. When she looked at him, he gave a flirtatious smile and said ' thama hai haat mera toh umr bhar nibhana'

And he and pinky started gigling. Soumya blushed till her roots. By the tine it was evening they were dead tired and they decided to take it easy. They juss roamed.

Finally, pinky started feeling sleepy and they decided to return.

Soumya suggested dropping by her flat and Aryan readily agreed.Aryan was driving and Pinky was sleeping in the back. Soumya laid her head on the head rest and closed her eyes. Aryan looked at her through the mirror. How tired she was and still so beautiful. She had this easy fun side that Aryan never knew about. Pinky liked her a lot and enjoyed the day like she never had before. Aryan was thankful to god that Soumya was in his life now and he has got second chance hopefully.

Aryan could n't contain himself, he slowly touched her face. And Soumya opened her eyes. There was so much feelings in Aryan's eyes. Soumya didnt know what to do. All her sophistication left her. She was the same gawky gal who would stare at Aryan. Suddenly they heard a loud horn.

Aryan returned his glance back to the road. He was about to kiss her! 'My god! I don't know if she wants me. what if she was offended and stopped the friendship?'

Soumya cursed the driver who blew the horn. Aryan was going to kiss her. Their very first!

They had a very awkward silence. Thank god that they reached her building. She lived near Powai lake on a tarrace flat on 25th Floor. She went ahead to open the door while Aryan parked the car and carried Pinky up.

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Shadows Have Not Gone Yet

"Nellie! Nellie come here", she gigled as she ran behind that cute impish little retriever puppy. Just 5 months old but lotsa naughtiness in it. She ran some more behind her finally tired she sat down. Nellie was not done yet. She kept barking at Amelia, a cute 7 year old girl with golden hair and very striking voilet eyes.

Amelia sat down. Nellie ran back to Amelia and rolled over to get petted by her. Amelia laughed and indulged Nellie.

And then it was night. Amelia hated going back to her room back home. She and Nellie went directly to the kitchen where they had food and had to go to her room before 'Uncles' come. She was instructed not to talk or come in any contacts with 'uncles'. She was scared of them.

Uncles made weird noises in the night. Sometimes they shouted. Sleeping in her closet of a room she and Nellie cuddled togather. They never even whimpered. If she wanted to go to toilet she used the secret door. It opened up to a secret passage that was earlier used for storage now was infested with all kinds of insects. Amelia liked it there.

As always, Amelia fed nellie and then sat eating talking to Nellie. An uncle came in the kitchen. Seeing him there Amelia fled with Nellie right behind her. She ran and hid in the closet. She has to sleep hungry tonite.

Her heart was thudding. But no one followed her. She hugged nellie and settled for one more night of darkness and weird sound. She hadn't experienced anything else ever but she still wasn't used to it.

She always wondered, what goes on in the night in there. All the lights burning bright. So many uncles who come and go. Always smelling weird. Shouting loudly and music... After sometime there are these weird voices.. movement of cots and then silence.. And thats when Amelia slept.

Not tonite though. Amelia looked out through the narrow slit. Seemed as if every one has slept. She tiptoed into the kitchen. Grabbed some food and ran back. Nellie and she had a nice bite.

If only she knew that 'uncle' saw her.... Waited for her to eat and then sleep. Slowly uncle came in. Nellie whelped but softly. She was trained to be quiet. However, she was alert. Ready to paunce.


But she had no idea what was going on. She was trained to keep away from uncles too just like Amelia. The uncle came and......

Amelia, sensing something terrible opened her eyes. But it was dark. All the lights were off. All she felt was someone covering her face with his hands. Large hands. Stinky and huge. It covered her face. And then.... She came to know why there are weird noise and movement of cot. Amelia grewup that night.......

Amelia didn't scream. She couldn't. Nellie finally came to know that whatever is ahppening is bad so she paunced on the uncle. Bit him hard. Uncle got enraged. He grabbed Nellie and threw her down. And thats when Nellie cried out loud. Uncle ran off fast.

Suddenly lights were turned on. They found Amelia huddled in a corner. Scared like an Rabbit. Suddenly a lady asked them to move to let amelia breathe... They moved out. And thats when the light streamed in. And they found dead Nellie.. Blood splattered all around the place.. on Amelia..

Seeing her best friend dead in this way Amelia couldnt contain. She closed her eyes, covered her ears and screamed. Into the night. It was an inhuman cry.Blood curdling and very animilistic.

Amelia woke up with a scream. She looked at the watch. It was 3 o' clock in the morning. She may as well wake up now.

This was her routine. Others called her weird. She called it survival..But we know.. we know that shadows have not gone yet.. Amelia will never be normal.. she never would marry and give birth... You see he still lurks in the dark.. he lives and abuses in the dark recesses of her mind.. her memories

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She story 2

She was 14. He was a year older. She was a supposed to be a geek steeped in books. She knew nothing about love and romance. It was her first time in "Coaching classes". She was feeling sad and lost. you see she is very shy. And then comes her best friend from school . Somehow they chose the same classes and they didnt even know before. If she wasnt already in her seat she would have hugged her.

Her friend sat with her. Then she started making friends all around her. For you see, she was a very friendly soul. She sat in the first bench like all studious students. Thats how she saw him.

He was the potential bad boy. Never good in studies. He was known as bad boy. She saw him and learned what love at first sight means. She felt that recognition, that special jolt. And when he looked straight into her eyes, she put it down. He said hi to her newly made friend and smiled at her. She was floored.

She was not yet matured enuf to understand what she felt. She knew though it is something to hide. She kept it a secret but since that day she noticed him. His sweet smile. The way he opened his mouth when he is concentrating. every small gesture she noticed. No one knew. No one thought this gal can have such thoughts.

She would have talked to him. But he didnt talk much to girls esp a gal was linked with him and he was done wid her antics and gals in general. He was very handsome and gals invariably fell for him. Was it his aloofness with handsome face and badboy image? she didnt know.

They only saw each other. Many a times their eyes met. They smiled. He used to get beatings from the sir. Sir believed in traditional way of teaching and he was not very interested in studies in general. She was the only one who thought he didnt deserve them. He was a prankster. He stirred her innocent heart and he didnt know.

She and her friends were prankster too. They would catcall him in his moms voice for you see one of the firend was living in same building as him. Thats when she saw his first time outside the coaching classes. You don't need sherlock holmes as in why she loved her coaching classes.

The first smile in the heat of afternoon gave her comfort that thousand coolers couldnt give. Then the next year she had other friends from her school. She left the first bench and came to third. He left the last and came to third. Both in different rows but near.

She started feeling more than she could handle. You see they finally got to be not just friends but very close friends. She was the only girl he talked a lot. She could get away with anything with him. For example like most ppl they had opps-bats game. She would always hit him. he never ever hit her back hard. Once she hit him so hard that he cried out loud. Since that day she never hit him.

Again once she played a prank on him. Misplaced his slippers. He had habit of removing them. When he fidgeted for them as the time to leave was near... Sir saw and hit him real bad. And in the meantime she had kept it back so sir got even more angry. Well when she confessed he didnt even get angry for a second and infact comforted her!

There are many such memories. When she cried, he would say her name in that special way that she had to smile for him. No one ever had that power on her. Still no one has. Can she forget the cuppa of tea in the nearby tea shop by 6:30 in the morning while everyone are sitting in the class waiting for them to return? So many dayz they sat togather on pretext of studying and kidded around! Never alone ofcourse. In a group but so completely alone in her thoughts......................

The way he stood up for her, the way he cared. And when he had an accident, it was like the ground slipped by her feet! how she worried for him. The way she sat by his side in the hospital, wanting to touch him but shy enough even then to not to try.

The way she complained the last time that he didnt wish her luck for exams. And the sweetly romantic way he made her rick stop only to wish her luck and continueing the same all thrrough the exams. Can anyone imagine how special she felt?

She was supposed to leave cities even then. And when she told so, his reaction was so special. To a comman friend he said," She is the only girl I really liked in the classes. I will miss her.

She held on to that thought for long too long. the way she used to go to the public librabry coz he worked there. how she sucked up his bro! But he was lost like many more will be down the road of time.......

She still remembers his wonderfully crooked smile. His special tone in whikch he talked called her name.... The way he looked. If he was sad for a scond she somehow knew. She wont reach out she will ask her best friend to reach out. He knew that too he never commented.

Well seems like for a change he cared too isnt it? If he did his ego came in between. he changed hsi attitude the day 10th result broke. somehow the dreams they made to go to college togather everything changed they went to diff colleges.. he into commerce n she into science..

She held on until the aforementioned he entered her life....she lived on minuscule information that her best friend trickeled coz u see all others from her group were in same college only she wasnt!

It is easy to drift away.. only onething is constant no one else ever inspired her to write poems! She wrote her love poems only for him......

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She story 1

She was a normal gal. Extremely so. Only thing that was special was she was very popular. Every one was her friend for sure. only no one noticed her much. Its hard to explain. If she isnt there the group will miss her terribly but if she is there ppl tend to forget her.

He was extremely charming. Casanova types. Everyone liked him to be around. However, he was the most gossiped about guy.

She didnt try to be his friend. He wasnt interested in her. He liked her friend. her friend was cute. they.... she n her friend were mysterious always keeping to themselves. She still talked to everyone. Her friend didnt evidently was a challenge. especially for the casanova types.

He approached her. She didnt think much. They thought he was handsome but spoilt. not worth their attention. Then her friend left college and she was all alone. She didnt know how to approach the already made friends! groups were already formed......

She stayed alone. He sensed the loneliness in her? We don't know his thoughts so won't talk abt it. He approcahed her. First for a movie. Always wid a group . She agreed once. Had awesome fun. The group was funny and very very njoyable. That evening he and she returned in train. It tended to be empty. She and he both were hanging on the train. Most of us who have some time or the other hung on the train knows how it feels. The rush of air....

They accidentaly touched. An electric current rush through her. She didnt know what to think abt it. It was a special and new territory. She was scared. She asked him to be her 'brother', he didnt like the idea. He asked why. What could she say?

She said coz she wants to be special.. he ahs soo many friends as girls.. she wanted a special place. He agreed. It was romantic... dinner in a small hotel. No one there to eat but them. He asked her to dance! She was so self conscious but she complied.....

He came to leave her till the door. Her friends were worried abt her disappearing act. It was the first time. after that they got used to it. You are right, the whirl of outings and movies started. everytime they togather. She took pains to never repeat that incident again. SLowly things became so normal that she forgot to be cautious. Tempting fate? Who can say?

They started hanging togather after college. Everyone tagged them togather. They insisted they are brothers n sisters. Well meaning friend told ' He is not a nice guy.' She said I know he is a waste of life. Who knows him better than me? FOr u see they had grown real close. She didnt know when or how only that they had. They had this special place away from eveyone. A special niche which only they knew a secret. They had spent many a evenings sitting there. Not talking much too. Just relaxing. She cherished these moments. She knew even then that he wud always have that special place in her heart which no one will replace....

Such wonderful relation cannot last long.. Can it? It didnt. He got some papers back and had to leave her behind or rather she moved ahead in studies and he in life. They lost touch. She tried hard to keep it. Though it was no longer possible. Slowly she started wrapping herself inside. She cudnt reach him anymore if physically she did than emotionally didnt. He ws coiled inside...

She didnt know it how much until one day he raged.. how much u want? I already tell u soo much. She had become demanding.. things had changed. he had, Proably she had too. If she hadnt she did now. Their relation dropped rapidly. Until they hardly called.

It was her last sem. PL's were going on. She knew she is going to shift places. Shift cities. If she didnt meet him now n say goodbye she never would!

She called him.....

An excerpt from her diary...

To be contd....

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29 Apr 2005

Hello Diary,

I called him again. When his phone was ringing I felt
anticipation running through my body. Some kind of electricity coursing through every part of my body. Even my toes were tingling. I was aware of every part of
my body as I was never before. How could this happen? I wasn't even talking to him. The phone was just ringing!

How am I going to meet him when I feel such strong emotions just by anticipating his call? How am I ever going to say good bye? Am I in love? If yes, then why is this feeling not sustaining me? Why don't I feel happy about it? Isnt love a happy feeling? I am contradictory! How can I call him my brother when I am in love? And there is this possiblity that he doesnt even like me as
much. God please!!!

Let him love me. I want someone in my life so very much. I dont even want any commitments. I wud never push him for anything. Even if he dumps me its okay. I wanna feel how it feels to be his love. To be loved as if i am the only one... Jhoota hi sahi......

I want to feel how it would be to be in his arms by his liking. To be kissed by him..just to feel him by my side. So close that no one can come between us. I want to see love in his eyes. Drown in hsi wonderful eyes.... Eyes
that see through your soul.. Pools of shadows that dont let out anything but engulf everything. I want to cook for him, wash his clothes. I want to listen to his problems ease away his tensions. When he is tired I want to mop his brows.I want to be with him in every step of his. Success and failure both alike if not as his mate then as his friend...

God I cannot say good bye to him. not him!! Cannot leave him. I want to be part of his life even as a worthless waste. I know i will compromise ego for him. Please god save me from this bottomless pit called as love....

Oh what wretch i am!!! Instead of concentrating on studies i am talking all rubbish abt him! I guess everyone has soft spot a weakness in their armor.. I guess he is for me. Even with all his shortcomings his lies he is still welcome if only he stays with me! if only.........

oh god why did you made me love him??? he wudnt love me ever I know. I have seen in his eyes. He doesnt love me i know god why???

The excerpt is complete.
........................................... to be contd

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30 April 2005

Hello again,

I tried to call him so much today. His phone was ringing all day and no one is picking up...It is so frustrating. Now that I ahve decided to talk to
him, he seems so faaar.. I have decided I will call him just once that is final.

I wonder will he come tomorrow as promised? I fervently wish so. I want him to come. I will wait impatiently though.

What if he doesnt come? God don't let it be so.I know I would never call him again if he doesnt come today. I wouldnt say good bye to him and I would leave . Please lord dont let this happen.

I accept i love him. I really do. I have emotions so strong that I wonder how i was ever so blind? What if he is trying to avoid me? I can do nothing abt it I got to bear it if that is to be. Only time can tell.................

1st May 2005

He didnt come. Surprisingly my life didnt stop. The day was as usual.Whats with me? why don't I feel normal feelings? Its as if I never loved him. Everything back to normal. Is this truth of what I felt yesterday is truth?

I dont know what to make of my feelings. I called him up. We talked. Some how it wasnt the same. I ddint feel like talking at all. I was anticipating to feel the same rush again. I wanted to catch that rush again.It was such an wonderful experience sadly it didnt come. It was anticlimatic. The chat was....

What to do? What to feel? Ia m confused

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She wanted him there when she needed him. He wasnt there. she was hurt but still understanding. Initially she hurt but later thought he may have had his own problems. But she had been there for him she wanted to him to be there. Not help her juss listen to her. Still she was ready to forgive but he didnt reach
out to her! didnt care to.

Life goes on. hers did too. She left the city made new friends new life. Forgot him as much as it is realistically possible. She had once gone to meet her friends, hoping furatively to meet him. She had come back a changed person. A job and right kinda friends give a certain kind of confidence. She felt n exhuded confidence and sophistication. She met him. How joyous she was but he didnt have time for her then. He wanted her to wait. But she had done with waiting for him. So many times he would be late or not turn up she waited now she wont. She had moved on you see. She left (Ego hath its own fall).

A year went by. She had a bf now. She was finally happy. One fine day she got a misscall from her ole city. She knew one of her friends r playing mischief so she called back. and it was him. He called her. He missed her. She was confused by the feelings she was feeling. Hadnt she moved on? Isnt she in a relation? this feeling she is feeling is just for a ole friend who is close. She cant feel the same again. She cant let herself he would leave her again. This semblance of normality that she had painstakingly created would be lost.

Still she talked to him. Chatted online. told him about her newly found love. She imagined she detected a tinge of jealously. She was pleased enough to want to clear all the cowwebs in their realtionship and start anew. He seemed willing too. She detected some feelings. Enogh feelings to miss her. She was in 7th heaven! Was this her illusion? She didnt know. She tole him about that few dayz when she felt she was in love. Now she is sure she isnt. She has a guy who would be with her for always.

She realised whoever be in her life there was this special corner where he will rule always. He may not be in her life for long he will come back and they will have same special relation coz she has that special place saved up for him. She accepted with a pain in the heart coz she knew she doesnt mean as much to him. He can easy leave her

And thats wat he did. they were again lost in the murky water of time. they lost contact. She was left stranded again like always.

What happened after that? I leave that to the readers imagination. Probably he retured. probably he didnt and she waited all life probably she didnt who knows? only time will tell

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A Love Story - The First Meeting

Chapter 3

Sea and rocks have been a havan for lovers since long. The clashing of waves on to the rocks have sparked many a passion. It has witnessed many moans and drowned it in its overpowering roars. It has secrets untold if only you listen. On such an beautiful evening, in throes of love, Soumya was waiting for Aryan. Dreaming and apprehensive. After all those years of waiting, finally Aryan can be hers. She was terrified that he wouldn't. Then what would be left for her? Only fact that Aryan will still be hers kept her going. The wobbly and clumsy gal is long gone, buried below the layer of sophistication. It wasn't easily achieved. We won't talk about the endless years of pain and humiliation and despair. That is best left in the past. Right now, I would like you to imagine a lady in love. Anticipating her lover any minute. The sweet and shy smile needs to be seen to know. I am sure the observant of your lot would agree how invaluable that smile is......

The mobile rings."Hello Aryan?"

"No sweetheart its me Raj. Kya baat hai mujhe bhool gayi?" 'Did you forget me?'

" No sweetie, Its just that I was expecting another call."

"Oh! Then let me keep the phone" , Raj said hurt. Raj is a good friend but very sensitive.

"Darling, listen. I was waiting for Aryan's call. We are finally meeting! After 15 years"

The happiness in Soumya's voice was infectious.

Raj laughed. " This calls for a party. So when do I get all the details. haan....??? " "Next time, I wanna meet him! Who is this guy who can make my angel forget me? " , he teases.

"If there is a next time", Soumya quipped.

"Sweetheart, he will be an idiot not to. You are the best"

"Thanks darling. So hows your wife?"

"Doing great. By the way she will need the details too. Please save my breath and come home for dinner okay?"

"We will see"

" Please. You know her countless questions. She makes me mad."

"She wants you mad. Says you are really very good when you are mad" , Soumya teased.

"Ha ha ha. That is so not true. I am always very good"

" Vain as a peacock"

" Boo!"

" Acchha suno you keep the phone alright?"

"Yes ,Ma'am. If only you promise to come"

" Wouldn't miss it for any reason. I love Jenny's cooking"

"And not mine?" , he said in mock hurt.


"Darling,I like everything about you " , She replied. This is their age old game spanning 10 years when Soumya first met him. And even then Raj was happily engaged. No sparks between them ever just plain friendship, such friendship is hard to find. Soumya knew that and cherished it. He is the only one who knows her bleak past that we decided not to talk about. Soumya was smiling. There is no better way than to start a new chapter in her life than with wishes from Raj.

Raj was concerned about Soumya. Although he didnt want to say anything to her. He didnt want her to be used. He wondered if he can love again like Aryan seems to be? Probably he must be using her. He decided to do some discreet probing once he meets her, Soumya hates when people worries for her.


Meanwhile, Soumya was impatient. She wanted to see the sunset with Aryan. Ahem! The fickle mind, earlier she wouldn't have thought about it and now she is irked by the fact that he isn't here yet. Soumya tried to call him.

At the same time, Aryan was bushed. So much crowd, he couldn't board the train. Ah the multitude of trafffic and the crowd of Mumbai trains. A taste acquired. Aryan was not thinking about it though. He was busy calling Saumya to notice the crowd or the pushes n pulls of the train (How boring! I would have so enjoyed it...) But it was coming busy. He was miffed. How can she be busy talking to someone else when she is meeting him for the first time? Has he read the signals wrong?
May be she is not very interested in meeting him, Just out of decency! He felt stupid coming. Felt like going back.( Just imagine what he would have missed if he had walked back!!)


Finally, Aryan reached Marine drive. The beautiful shoreline adorning Mumbai. The Queens necklace. The sun was just setting. Aryan found her sitting and gazing the setting sun. He had to hold his breath. She was beautiful. Drenched in red glow of setting sun, she looked like a golden goddess. Flaxen black hair flowing down to her midriff, like most South Indians. Dressed in a simple salwar kameez in red. It would look gaudy on anyone but her. She had this flair for understated elegance in whatever she wears.

Aryan stood there looking at her, again beset by doubts, this could be a beautiful start or earth shattering end. For him at least. He can't fall in love again. Not after Soumya . And then slowly she turned around. Some third sense told her Aryan is here. And they stood there looking at each other. It seemed that world had stopped. Nothing was there but them. Words weren't needed to express their happiness their need.... Aryan moved forward to hug her, but Soumya gave her hand to shake and he stopped.

"Hello", she said

"Finally we meet"

"Yes, I am so glad!"

"Me too"

"I have so much to ask you so much to tell!, shall we catch it over the coffee cup?"

"Yeah sure!"

“ How was your trip?”

“Fine” , he replied in monosyllable.

“ Hows your daughter?”

“Fine”.Aryan was thinking, 'Is this what I was waiting for? It is a mistake.'

It was a wonderful setting, a handsome man a beautiful woman, madly in love. The breeze was gently teasing them. The soothing music in the back ground. The pink sky of the summer evening suffusing good humour all over. Aryan could not take his eyes off the way Soumya's hair was whisked by the breeze. It took conscious effort to not put her hair back behind her ears. Soumya was looking out and not at him. He wondered if that is good or not. On one hand he was glad he could see her without restraint and on the other hand he wanted her to look at him and not the view. 'God! I am jealous of the view! What the heck is wrong with me?'


Soumya was distraught. She didn't know what to do! She wanted to talk but she didn't know what! 'Why are we so uncomfortable? Where did all the comfort level go? We talked so well on fone on chat! Why are we so uncomfy??? Why am I feeling shy? Not after all these years. God help me! I have waited for this so long!”

Soumya turns to Aryan and tries again, “ Why didn't you bring Pinky?. I have brought a gift for her. I want to meet her so much.”

“I just thought, its better we met first”

“Ah you wanted to be sure I am good for your little princess”

“You know you are the best thing that can happen to my child. In fact you are the best thing that happened to me”

“Shut up. Don't make me into something I am not and don't change the topic. When do I get to meet her?”

“You can meet her anytime you want”

“Why not now then??”

“She was playing with kids there didn't want to come”

“But I can come”

“Oh great! that way I can introduce you to Akshay!”

“Why not? I know them. Not personally. Our company did a project for him”

“Son of the bitch didn't tell me that at all”

“You guys discussed me? And they say women are gossipy!” , Soumya smirked

“Ha ha ha . Trust you to comment on that” , Aryan returned in good humour.

The ice was broken. They spent talking ,teasing and laughing all the way to Akshay's place. They had found their rhythm.


They reached home. Akshay and Sunitha were glad to see Aryan so happy so was Pinky.

Sunitha discretely asked Soumya " You seem to be very taken with Aryan"

"Yes I am! He is a chum"

"That he is. Only don't hurt him. I don't want to beat around the bush. It may be easy for you to move from relationship to relationship not him. He is too emotional. Please consider that"

"Aryan is lucky to have such concerned friends. But he is an adult and so am I. I wouldnt ever hurt him. We know exactly where we stand. There is no lies between us", Soumya replied coldly. Sunitha's word stinged.

Aryan came over to see what they were talking. He had some idea and he didnt want Sunitha to make a fool of herself.

"Whats this wishpering? Let us into the secret too"

"Hardly, We don't gossip like fishermen", Soumya quipped.

"Touche", Aryan had the grace to wince.

"Oh its almost 10:00 pm! I got to go. Long day", Soumya said picking her purse.

"Soumya aunty, rukho na! Tell me good night story and go ", Pnky wailed.

"Okay. Come i will tuck you in"

Soumya took Pinky to the bed. Told her a nice story. Kissed her good night. By the time Pinky slept it was 11:00 pm. After saying quick good night she left.

Adults underestimate kids. They think kids don't understand, but they do more than adults. They think straight without any ego. Thats why Pinky was ready to be friends with Soumya. She wanted her daddy to be happy and she knew it before her daddy himself that it lies with Soumya. She had seen him cry late in nights when he thought no one sees. She did. And for the same reason, she won't ever forgive her mother. As expected Pinky and Soumya went along real fine after all both wanted to make the person they love the most happy.


They had decided to go to Esselworld the next day. Soumya , Pinky and Aryan. Akshay and Sunitha wiser in the ways of love, knew this was the occasion they should miss and made their excuses.


That night, for the first time Pinky felt happy. She had decided, she would do anything to bring Aryan and Soumya togather. It would be her little secret and her gift to her Beloved Daddy! She prayed to god that the angel Soumya aunty, always stay in her life. ' They say God listens to the innocent child the most. Seems like it isn't it?'


Soumya was pleasantly tired. She was so excited about tomorrow! She didn't want to sleep. She dreamed all night. Sweet and tender.


Aryan was warmed by the way Soumya put Pinky to sleep.It was the dream he saw for him and Prachi! It seemed so right with Soumya.In a way, he never fitted with Prachi. Being with Soumya made him realize how wrong he and Prachi were-As a couple. He was glad things turned out so fine. For a moment he imagined that Soumya was his wife. It felt so wonderful. But his dreams weren't just for Soumya as a mother of the child. It was for Soumya as his wife, Coz readers, Soumya was an extremely desirable lady and Aryan a full hot red blooded male.

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A Love Story- Anticipation

Chapter 2

“Oww I am sorry to miss picking you up! I should have come. Damn the meeting Grrrrrrrrr”, Soumya wailed down the phone.

Aryan laughed into the phone, “That's okay. We are meeting tomorrow anyways.”

“ I am sorry sweets, no go. The goddamn project! I can meet you on day after”

“ Hey thats okay. I understand. Work rules us.” he replied. Deflated and a bit sad.

“ Oww how sweet. I will hug you for that”

He laughs, “Waiting for that”

“Okay then, bye.”

“Bye”

Akshay and Sunita were happy to see him happy when he called her up. However, now they were concerned. Aryan was too involved too fast. They had seen him suffer and didn't want it to repeat. They decided to meet her and check her out. They could do nothing but wait.

Aryan was too restless to sleep but too tired to do anything else. He expected Soumya to call. He was waiting for it.

Soumya was feeling frustrated. Aryan was here, finally here. However, she cant meet him. After 15 years she will see her first love. The guy who made her dream made her hope. She was so desperate to meet him. She will call him once this damn report was over.

'Aryan.. just hold on sweets! Few more minutes and I will be free to call you.'

Soumya sighed when she saw her boss come towards her and not with a happy smile. He said,”I want you to change this report in all the red marked points.I have made the necessary remarks include them. ”

“Can I do it home?”

“I am afraid not. You know it is too confidential.”

“Yes I know. Sigh!” , said Soumya and started to work.

It was 12 o' clock in the night when she was finished. She debated whether to call or not. However she was sure he would wait. They had this comfortable relationship that they could anticipate others move. In a way she couldn't ever anticipate anyone else in her past relationships. Guess thats coz she never really loved them. She tried hard but she couldn't love anyone else. Not completely.

She called. And she was relived that she did. Talking to Aryan gave her comfort that nothing else could. She was relaxed and comfortable the moment she heard his voice. That soothing voice that fired her dreams to the zenith. She was ready to sleep and go to the godforsaken meeting tomorrow.

Aryan was glad she called. He could hear the tiredness in her voice. He was glad that he would be the last thought in her mind when she slept. He so longed to meet her. He wished he could kiss her weriness away. He slept dreaming of her.

The next day, Soumya was happy. She felt as if she is in the heaven. The meeting ended early. And she can go to meet Aryan. Finally, all those years of waiting and dreaming is finally going to bear fruit. She couldn't wait to meet him.

She called him and told him to come. He was joyous. She could hear the happiness in his voice. The happiness she put there. How she had longed to do the same all her college life. How she had waited for a dribble of information about him. She had watched him marry that loser of the woman. She knew they weren't right together. She knew he was for her and her alone. She waited long and her love was true. God finally answered her prayers. Its just few more days and he would be in her arms. Arms that were aching for his touch. Just few more days. And few hours from now she will see him.

'Aryan here i come darling...............'

>

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A Love Story- Aryan's Journey To Mumbai

Chapter 1

The train was reaching the Nagpur station. On this sultry afternoon, people traveling in the train had only one solace, Communication. How much ever face to face conversation may go out of fashion, in a train travel, most asocial of a man starts having conversation. Aryan however, our hero, not the quietest person, is in no mood of conversation. He has that sweet countenance of guy in throes of love and who doesn't know what to do with it.

Aryan was being nostalgic. He was trying to remember Soumya that was, some 15 years ago when he was irritated by the puppy crush of a gal who was thin mousy and nerdy!! Being a butt of countless jokes, he avoided her like a plague. But years down the line, when he met her again, online, things changed.

During those lonesome nights, initially, when Prachi left, he hardly knew what to do with the time he had. Sleep was hard to come and every gesture reminded him of what he lost.. To run away from reality he had hit the online bandwagon of lifeless n lost souls. Every day was the same. The same stories only the faces change. Saga of hurt and betrayal and sorrow. However, he had struck gold. He met Soumya. Didn't know initially it was her. She didn't too.

He started liking coming online. A sensitive soul who sympathized with him, laughed and in general made him feel hopeful for the first time since Prachi left. And now he is no longer angry with Prachi. Aryan realized that Prachi was right. They never would have been ever happy for long. They were just too different. Like water and oil. He had been holding on to a dream. I guess it takes a perfect match to show what imperfection is...

Aryan was suddenly apprehensive. Here he was with is 7 years old daughter, which Prachi accepted to let go. Would Soumya understand his need to be with this child? Would she be as loving? Aryan was spinning dreams of how it would be..

'” Soumya, I love you”, Aryan said.

Soumya replied,” I know that idiot. I have waited so long for you. What took you so long to realize that I am yours?”.

“I have this child, she is important to me. Will you be able to love her?”

“You insult me ,Aryan. This child is yours. How can I not love her?”

Or sometimes he would think,

“I love you Soumya”

“I know. But I don't love you. We can only be friends.”

“Oh! Yes only friends. I am sorry Soumya”

“Don't be. I am flattered that you love me. But I am not the same gal from your college. I have changed so have you. I love someone else now”

“ Is there someway I can make you love me?”

“What about your kid? Am I supposed to live with the symbol of you ex-wife all my life???”

“Yes. You are right. There is no way. Can we be still friends?”

“I don't think so Aryan”

“Oh! So it is a good bye then”

“I am afraid yes”

A whistle boomed and woke Aryan up. Pinky was shaking him, “Daddy Daddy.....Are we in Mumbai??”

“Sweetheart not yet. We have a long way to travel”

“How much time daddy?”

“Ten hours to go”

At the age of seven, Pinky was a curious girl with lots of question. Aryan was proud of her. If anything went right in his world it was Pinky. Aryan wondered if she will like Soumya.

“ Daddy will we go to essel world?”, Pinky asked.

“ Any thing for you baby”.

“Daddy who is Sunita aunty??”

“She is wife of Akshay Uncle. You remember he had come for Diwali??”

“ Oh yes. Do they have kids?”

“Yes they do. But they are older”

“Okay”

And then Pinky slept off in his arms. He started dreaming again. This time about the past. Prachi when he first saw her. The very first smile, shy and hesitating. The first time she talked to him. And the last. How much difference. He wondered, not the first time if he could have done something to change it. But it was the first time there was no pain and he was sure what happened happened for the best.

He tried to remember something about Soumya from the past. Strangely he couldn't. All he could is dream about the future. The train finally reached Mumbai. Aryan picked his sleepy child and luggage and thought Soumya here I come.....

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